The urge to solve
When something feels wrong, our first instinct is usually to fix it.
That makes sense.
We all want relief.
But over the years, I have found myself returning to one question before trying to solve anything.
What is the real problem?
Whether at work or in life,
I have learned that solving the wrong problem rarely changes anything.
The clearer we understand what is actually happening,
the easier it becomes to find a way forward.
Don’t Shoot the Messenger
There is an English expression:
Don’t shoot the messenger.
Blaming the person who delivers bad news does not change the news itself.
I think our emotions—and even our thoughts—can work in much the same way.
Symptoms Are Not the Cause
Imagine eating spoiled food.
Soon afterward, you begin vomiting or have severe diarrhoea.
The symptoms are unpleasant.
Naturally, you want them to stop.
But your body may be trying to remove something harmful.
If you focus only on stopping the symptoms,
without understanding why they appeared,
the real cause may still remain.
To me, emotions are often like that.
Anger.
Fear.
Sadness.
Anxiety.
The thoughts that keep returning.
They may not be the problem.
They may be pointing toward it.
What Is the Real Problem?
Sometimes we think,
“Maybe I should leave this relationship.”
But is the relationship the real problem?
Is it the dynamic between two people?
Or is something else asking to be seen?
For a long time, I searched for answers.
Now, I begin somewhere else.
I ask, What is this really trying to show me?
What Somatic Clarity Observes
In Somatic Clarity, we do not begin by judging emotions as good or bad.
Nor do we begin by trying to make them disappear.
We begin with observation.
What is happening?
What might this emotion—or this thought—be trying to communicate?
The more accurately we understand the problem,
the more naturally the next step often reveals itself.
Next Time
In this series, we will explore:
anger,
fear,
sadness,
discomfort,
and many of the signals our body and mind send us.
Not because they need to be eliminated.
But because they may be trying to tell us something worth hearing.
From The Compass
The Compass, scheduled for release in late July, brings together the ideas that underpin this series into a single map.
Here on the blog, I explore what those ideas look like in everyday life—one observation at a time.
